Raising respectful boys (and girls).

Recent events have me thinking especially hard about how to teach my children about sexual misconduct and overall respect for others. Not that these scenarios haven’t been in the news before, the issue of sexual harassment is as old as time. My first encounter with the term was when Anita Hill came forward to accuse now supreme court member, Clarence Thomas, of committing sexual harassment against her. It was a huge story back in 1991 and was a groundbreaking moment for women everywhere who finally felt empowered to come forward and speak. Whether you believe Anita’s story or not, that she came forward about such a controversial issue that had not been given much attention before gave others the sense that they could come forward as well.

I am the mother of three young boys, so it’s especially important to me to raise them with the knowledge that they must treat women with respect and dignity. Not to say that girls are off the hook either, as I point out in the title, girls need to be taught these things as well. Women and girls can often be responsible for “slut shaming” or spreading rumors about other females that they don’t like or are jealous of, we need to teach them that this is not ok and that they should treat one another the way they want to be treated. Do not make up stories or spread rumors about someone because your are jealous or competitive. Teach your girls confidence so they don’t feel the need to put others down in order to feel good about themselves. Celebrate each others beauty and accomplishments instead of tearing them down. This is not only the right thing to do, but will result in others feeling more inclined to celebrate them and lift them up instead of tearing them down.

Now I am certainly not the authority on how to teach your children respect and kindness but I do have a few ideas that could be helpful. Please share yours with us!

1. Showing your partner respect. The best way to show your sons and daughters how to treat the opposite sex is to treat your partner (if they are the opposite sex) with kindness and love.
2. Teaching them a sense of responsibility for their actions. When you see them mistreating one another or someone else make sure to correct this behavior. Even if it seems that the other party may be partially at fault it’s important they know it “takes two to tango”.
3. Simply talking to them about what it means to be respectful. I found this definition of the word at talkingtreebooks.com and the site also has some ideas on how to teach the concept to children.

Showing respect to someone means you act in a way that shows you care about their feelings and well-being.

Last but certainly not  least, the best way to teach respect is to show respect, so treat your children with the same respect and kindness you expect from them.

xo,

Hil

 

3 tips to start your weekend off right.

Happy Friday everyone! In many people’s minds the weekend is time to party. And that’s ok, you should relax and let loose a little. But if you want to achieve your physical, mental and life goals, you can’t take too long of a break. I know it’s hard to hear but if you are a person that craves a great body, mind, spirit… the work doesn’t stop for very long. I’m in pretty good shape but every day something taps me on the shoulder and says “when are you going to workout?”. I of course take days off, but always have a plan in the back of my mind to get back at it.

Here are my 3 tips for staying on track with your health and wellness goals (or getting on track depending on your circumstances) this weekend.

1. Plan your workouts. It doesn’t have to be a trip to the gym. If it’s family time you crave plan a hike, a bike ride or to play a little football with the kiddos. But start thinking about it now and make a plan to get some good exercise in this weekend.
2. Plan your diet. The weekends are a really tough time to stay on track nutritionally. It’s ok to indulge a little but have a general plan for what you will eat, when and how much. Think lots of vegetables, maybe some fish… if you want some tips email me.
3. Do not drink too much!!! This is where many people fail. I know it’s been a long hard week of work and taking care of family but don’t take it out at the bar room. A drink or two is fine, but you will inevitably fall of the health, wellness and success wagon if you drink too much. Most of us know the consequences of this: extreme fatigue, sickness and eating anything in site to feel better. Anxiety is also a big side effect of boozing. Besides, do you want to be hung over playing with your children on Saturday and Sunday?

What are your tips for a great weekend?

xo,

Hil

The only parenting advice I give.

I often get asked what is the best advice I can give to new parents. Having three kids I consider myself someone of a veteran at parenting, although admittedly far from perfect. But I have been through a lot with my boys, from babies to grade schoolers, so have some wisdom that I believe is helpful.

What is the one tip I give anyone who is embarking on the crazy path of parenthood?

Tell  your kids you love them of everyday and schedule one or two times during the day that are just for you and them. 

Believe it or not, even when you’re a SAHM (or maybe especially when you are) it’s very difficult to have quality time with your children. I’m talking about time that you aren’t distracted by a thousand other things that need to happen in your life and are just focused on them.

Find time in your day that is just for you and the kids, for me this came about pretty organically. The first year or two of my first born’s life, I felt like I was just haphazardly getting through the day and not having any real quality time with him. Finally as he got older I started bed time stories. This takes time as when they’re babies they aren’t going to sit with you and read a book. But once they do it’s such a lovely experience to share with them. I also find that we have some good talks after reading for a bit. We lie in bed and they tell me about their day or maybe go on and on about some new game they’re into (Minecraft anyone??). Night is a good time to do this as I find I’m more relaxed, the day is through and it’s easier to concentrate on whatever it is they want to talk about.

The second time I schedule with my kids, although not always successful depending on how the morning goes, is breakfast. It’s a great way to start off our day. Since the craziness of the day hasn’t quite begun we are able to enjoy some time and conversation together, and often have a few laughs.

What’s your best parenting advice? And what time do you enjoy most with your kids?

XO,

Hilary

 

Broken promises.

I made a promise to you guys that I would post workouts every week. I’m breaking that promise and I’m sorry. I’m focusing on other things at the moment so the blog will yet have to take a back seat. I will update once week on Tuesdays, so if you have any questions you want to ask me about exercise or diet please email me (ugobabyfitness@gmail.com) and I will either email you back or I will post my answer on the blog.

There are many things that are important; family, friends, community, giving back, career etc… It’s so hard to do it all! And we can’t really can we? So I have to delegate my time as I see fit and as things come up that are important. Usually those important things have to do with my children, in fact I have a smiley baby begging for my attention as I write this!

I’ve learned to role with the punches and realize when I’m taking on too much and need to get a few things off my plate or replace a few things with more important ones (there’s a good metaphor for healthy eating in there I think).

This can be incredibly frustrating, but when I get overwhelmed I get anxious, frustrated, tired and I’m not being the best I can be in any area of my life. I start to let people down, myself included, and it’s just not worth it. If you’ve ever felt this way I’d love to hear about it and your ways of coping with busy family life.

What are your tips for managing it all??

Thanks for reading!

xo,

Hilary

 

 

 

Week 2 of the 8 to Great Slim Down Challenge!

How did week 1 go for you ladies? As a review, I asked you to count calories, find opportunities to squeeze exercise into your day and performing a tabata circuit that I provided to you 3 times a day for at least 2 days this week (admittedly this was a tough one to accomplish as getting through it once was difficult for me).

Last weeks challenge was about self-awareness. Counting calories shows you how much you are actually consuming per day and hopefully will help you find places that you can cut back. Finding new ways to squeeze exercise in your day is a great way to get into the habit of thinking of opportunities for you to get fit. And the tabata challenge was to show you that you can get an intense workout in a short period of time, and once you get started it’s easier to keep going. You just have to start!

Week 2:

1) Eat breakfast. Many people skip breakfast, including myself when I’m in a rush! Before I had children I skipped breakfast regularly. Now I realize how important it is to keeping me energized, less anxious and content throughout my day. The weight loss benefits of eating breakfast are that it kick starts your metabolism and will diminish overall hunger throughout the day.

Of course I want you to choose a healthy breakfast. An example, whole wheat toast, organic preserves, eggs whites, fruit, yogurt and granola.

2) Meditate for at least 2 minutes per day. This will provide you more clarity, awareness, good sense and the ability to take pause when necessary (like when you’re reaching for that cupcake). If you are thinking to yourself that you cannot find the time or place to meditate that is absolutely not true. That’s why I posted a picture of a woman in a board room meditating, obviouly I don’t expect you to so this but the point is that you can find the time and place to clear your head for two minutes. No excuses!

If you need pointers check out my post on how to meditate here.

3) Workout. This weeks routine is going to be another Tabata circuit. In fact all of them are and it should get easier for you each week as your strength builds and you see the pounds come off. I want you to perform this circuit at least 3 times this week, that’s the only way you will begin to see results.

This weeks routine has a focus on your thighs, booty and arms. However, all of my routines will be full body workouts.

To review, I want you to perform each move in this circuit for 20 seconds on 10 seconds off for a set of 4. A total of 2 full minutes for each move.  The entire circuit will take 10 minutes. After 10 minutes rest for 2 minutes then repeat the circuit if you can. Try to repeat it up 3 times. Remember that this is a great calorie burning session so push yourself!

1) Skaters. Modifications: Jump side to side for more intensity, if you would like less intensity step it.

2) Push ups. Modifications: For less intensity out your knees on the ground, for more intensity knees off the ground and try and lift one leg up for 10 seconds and then switch for 10.

After these 2 moves rest for one full minute and move on…

3) Jumping lunges. Modifications: Remove the jump and simply step and lunge.

4) Side to side planks.  Modification: Bring the plank to your knees and simply hold it for 20 seconds on one side, switch sides for the next 20 second interval.

That it! Good luck everybody! And let me know if you have any questions about diet or exercise at Hilary@ugobabyfitness.com.

 

Xx,

Hilary Ann Lambert