“What’s your excuse?” and my love for African-American culture.

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I actually wrote something about the woman on the left a few years ago when she first appeared in the press. I hate to give her more publicity but the subject of a post-baby body has re-emerged since I had my third son 6 months ago and am already back in pretty good shape. It had me thinking about this lady, who is a self-proclaimed “fat shamer”.

The purpose of this site is never to make anyone feel ashamed of how they look and I apologize if it ever comes across that way! I understand that we all have different body types and lifestyles that make it easier or harder to get back into our optimal shape, especially after having a baby. And “optimal shape” is different for everyone, as the woman on the right proclaims that she is “okay with this” and I think she looks great.

I try to be sensitive to others feelings about their body and weight. I happen to have a skinny frame but have not avoided “image” shaming. I was told both that I have a big butt and “thunder thighs” when I was in high school. I used to struggle with the size of my derriere as in white culture we tend to think that having no butt or thighs is preferred and having really big boobs is most beautiful. So basically, being a rail with big breasts is preferred. Which, I should add, is very hard to achieve as our boobies are made up of fat cells and unfortunately we can’t decide where those go. I didn’t live up to the societal standard. At least according to magazines and television. We still get inundated with images of these supper skinny models and actresses, but I should say that it’s not as bad as when I grew up in the 90s when being a “waif” was all the rage.

This is where part of my love for African- American and Puerto Rican cultures comes in. The first people to tell me I had a nice body were some African- American girls at my high school. They told me I had a “black girls ass” lol! I looked at them strangely and one of them responded, “don’t get mad, it’s a compliment, you have a really nice butt”. And then there was the emergence of Jennifer Lopez. She was one of the first celebrities to have a big derriere and it was considered, arguably, the sexiest thing of the late 90s. It made me realize that there are so many different perceptions of what is considered “beautiful”. And from then on was proud of my bum, even flaunted it as an asset, no pun intended. Now I do exercises to increase the size of my butt!

What’s the point of the story? I guess it’s that if anyone intentionally insults you and makes you feel bad about your body, tell them to GFY.

xo,

Hil

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2 thoughts on ““What’s your excuse?” and my love for African-American culture.

  1. Well said! We aren’t Barbie dolls. Don’t be ruled by the current beauty ideal. It changes all the time and mostly it is defined by businesses that profit from a woman’s feeling of not living up to that ideal. Own it, love it.

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